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Open Mic on Social Media: Death of Crack Fries Is a Standup Comedy Invitation

December 12, 2018, 5:43 PM by  Alan Stamm

HopCat's decision to dump Crack Fries into the dustbin of dumb names creates chatter nearly as hot as deep fryer oil.

Online discussions arguments focus on whether abandoning the signature menu item's name after 11 years is (a) long overdue, (b) sad political correctness or (c) over-reported. 

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"The addictive quality of the fries and their cracked pepper seasoning inspoired the original name, HopCat's chief executive says. 

We look away from that brawl to savor suggestions for how the Grand Rapids-based group of 17 restaurants should rename the crispy, spicy fries that cost $6 to $9 when served separately. BarFly Ventures, the parent company, didn't ask for ideas -- but emerging humorists step up anyhow to audition one-liners on social media, where an open mic show is always on stage.

After scrolling past unfunny cracks that start with another drug name, we serve nine light bites for snacking:

  • Crick fries -- @markpal, Ferndale (Twitter)
  • Free advertising fries -- Dave Stockton, Flint
  • Medicinal fries
  • Pepper fries -- John Paul Halick, Waterford
  • Rally fries -- u/Judg3Smails (Reddit)
  • Freedom fries
  • Frisky fries
  • Potato sticks -- u/kparis (Reddit)
  • Vladimir Poutine -- HopCat (Crack Fries with topping)

Related article:

Finally, HopCat Gets Why Crack Fries Aren't A Joke And Never Were, Dec. 11



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